I’m back in Montreal since last month already.

I missed this view of Downtown Montreal from the Mount Royal.

As a ritual, I got a poutine in the first few days after my return. This time I was with tourist friends from France, among them, Florence, who also lived in China.

Walking around downtown, I saw that Montreal hasn’t changed much since my departure. The same streets are being repaired.

I quickly readapted to the North American lifestyle.

Compared to China, the sidewalks here are narrower and empty. One can look in all directions, in the middle of the afternoon, without ever seeing one single human being! (In China, at anytime, including at night, and in the countryside, there will always be, at the very least, a few people).

Pure air, nature, trees…

Water, wind, one million dollar villas…

But I still miss China and its flamboyant artists, with their vivid, dyed blond hair, their lens-less, thick-framed glasses, their pink Converse, their pants with strange patterns that don’t suit the rest of their clothes, who sing in a strange mix of Engrish and Chinese. Yes I do miss them, and I want to go back and see them perform live.

I miss the people too. Everywhere you go in China there is someone to be seen, there is bustling activity at anytime, nearly anywhere, even in the countryside. Conversely, in Quebec, there’s nobody. It’s dead. Past 10pm you won’t see anyone in downtown Montreal. Two extreme opposites.

I left Ying behind me… and that is what I miss most of China.

And friends.

I left my dirty apartment on Zhuque Avenue. On this picture, I had left the window open for a few days only and so was the result: a thick layer of dust on the walls, floor and furniture, all in a misty environment, covered in a perpetual thick smog… Really, those Montreal “smog alerts” sound ridiculous to me now!

Chinglish…

Please follow the usher or duty manager.
Duty manager will arrange those who have
the older, children or the deformities in by priority.
DO HAVE A GOOD TIME IN PIZZA HUT

In Montreal there is not really any Chinglish to be seen. Some Franglish can be seen but they are a little less obvious or funny. However, here and anywhere in the West, you see the opposite phenomenon: “Engnese” or “Frannese”… in short, mangled, meaningless Chinese tattoos.

Sometimes, it’s just a translitteration of a name. I guessed someone I saw in the metro was named “Ghislain”, because he had it tattooed in Chinese on his leg. In this case, on the picture above, I don’t know what it is. “Xingshengmeng” (hsingshengmeng). It doesn’t sound like a name…

If you break down this tattoo, you get 星: star ; 生: be born, create ; 夢: dream. One could try to interpret this riddle in a thousand ways!

On my Beijing-Toronto flight, two Chinese children were sitting beside me. I originally thought they were Canadians coming back from vacations visiting their family in China. But in the end I realized it was quite the opposite: they were growing up in Shenzhen, while their parents were immigrating in Canada. We spoke Chinese during the whole flight. And when we were close to landing, one flight attendant, a Torontonian of Chinese origin complimented me on my Chinese. Well, in general, you only need to say “ni hao” to get congratulations. But this time it seemed really sincere.

When we got the Canadian immigration papers, the customs declaration card, a senior Chinese woman asked me to help her fill her form out. She couldn’t understand the questions in English or in French. So I read each question one by one, and she had a funny reaction when I translated to her the last question: “Have you been on a farm in a country other than Canada in the last 14 days?” half surprised, hald shocked she replied “no! I’m from the city! I am not a peasant!”

Notice to prospective buyers: huge, three-storied house to sell in the Laurentians. Needs a lot of repair. Price around C$ 300,000.

Here’s someone who is contemplating his new house.

Lots of repairs and renovations to be done here. I could take the same picture in six months and see the difference. Before and After.

The Quebec French (or Canadian French in general) dialect, language or regional variation, whatever you decide to call it, is one of the only languages whose swearwords are almost exclusively religious terms. Here are some of them that pop out of my mind:

Hostie (host, wafer), tabarnak (tabernacle), calice, Moses, Christ, sacrament, baptême (baptism), …

Some of these expressions can be used as verbs or pronominal verbs, such as: (se) calicer, (se) crisser, (se) sacrer,… (“se” being the mark of pronominal verbs in French) Each one of these words has its own set of meanings and nuances.

Quebec nationalistic posters pasted on outside walls are not rare.

An Acadian flag. The Acadians are a French-speaking minority that nowadays mostly inhabit the province of New Brunswick as well as some communities in Nova Scotia, Prince Edward Island and Louisiana.

Another example of nationalism.

Let’s see some entertainment. Here musicians are practicing for their concert in a park.

An acrobat is rehearsing his performance.

A serial lover is preying on his next game.

A faux Jimi Hendrix is playing music…

Unfortunately nobody is listening.

The first time I saw Tian’anmen Square was in a taxi that was taking me to a hospital (where a sick traveller needed me as a translator). Then, as we were riding, all of a sudden, it appeared right next to me to the right side of the taxi.

I felt so excited! I had that strange feeling that always comes to me when I visit a famous place for the first time. It’s as if I was entering the TV, the photo, the magazine, the book or any other image from which I’d always known this place. I was finally there, I could see it in 3D, see all the parts that are usually omitted in photographs, and I could answer such trivial questions as “what stands in front of Tian’anmen Gate?” Now I just had to turn my head and I could see. (I didn’t take a picture of it, so if you want to see it, you need to come there!) I had that same feeling before, when I first came to Manhattan, when I saw the Eiffel Tower, the Red Square and the Ermitage as well as other less famous places, but equally important to me, which I had known only through photographs before seeing them in person.

Before I left Beijing, I visited the Mausoleum of Mao Zedong. I had already visited the Mausoleum of Lenin two years prior, so I could notice a few differences between both.

First of all: queues. Visitors to Lenin’s Mausoleum form a relatively long queue which moves slowly.

However in China, the queue is incredibly long, but moves fast. It takes around half an hour to get from the starting point of the queue to the end, at the entrance to the Mausoleum. I estimated that any time there are about 5000 people queuing. They come from all over China: grand parents and their grand children, parents and their children, tour groups, foreign tourists,…

The Mausoleum of Mao is much bigger and more imposing than Lenin’s. It was built in 1976-1977, after the death of the Chairman. The intention was probably to build a more imposing Mausoleum which would surpass Lenin’s in all aspect. It was built during the Sino-Soviet Split after all.

“毛主席纪念堂” (Máozhuxi Jìniántáng) = Temple to the Memory of Chairman Mao (litteral translation).

Inside, there are two rooms (in Lenin’s Mausoleum there is only one open to the public). In the first room there is an immense statue of Mao, sitting and smilling, showing a sympathetic, paternal and reassuring face. Thereafter we enter the second room where Mao’s body is lying. He lies in an open coffin. Over him, there is a red flag with yellow hammer and sickle printed on it. You can see this symbol at the base of the coffin too. A glass dome is placed on top of the coffin, so we see Mao through this glass. All we see of Mao is his head. His eyes are closed, as if he were asleep; his sparse, grey hair are combed in the same way as in the 70s. Behind him stand four armed guards. Mao’s coffin is located inside a room with glass walls. Visitors walk outside the room and see Mao through the glass wall, at approximatively 3 metres from the corpse.

As in Lenin Mausoleum, one cannot bring a camera inside, nor can one take a photo with his cellphone. You need to deposit your bag in a building located a little far away from the Mausoleum. Also, you need an ID proof to enter (ID card for the Chinese, passport for the foreigners). This rule is often heard from the speakers around the Mausoleum, but only in Chinese. The first time you see the rule written in English is at the entrance to the Mausoleum, that is after queuing for at least half an hour. If you can produce an ID card at the entrance, you will be denied entry. One also has to wear if not formal clothes, at least “respectful” clothing.  Men cannot wear sandals and women cannot be too sexy.

That was my last tourist activity in China before departure.

On the cone: “和谐社会” (héxiéshèhuì) Harmonious Society.

Two days of sustained torrential rain followed a long week of scorching hot temperatures.

Well, that’s summer in Xi’an. One day, very hot and humid, and the other day, refreshing torrential rain.

I’ve had this project in mind for a long time already… to take pictures while holding an umbrella, which gives the viewer a feeling of being inside the photo, under the rain, breathing the cold, damp air.

Getting off an overhead bridge.

My two year studies in China are now finally over. I will report on this later, when I am back in Montreal. One of the things I will miss most from my life in China is the diversity of people I met here. They were Brazilians, Russians, Ecuadorians, Italians, French, Americans, Australians, Canadians and, obviously, Chinese.

One of the most interesting phenomena that I experienced here was with the Latin students, those whose language belongs to the Latin languages family (e.g. French, Italian, Spanish and Portuguese). We could manage to understand each other by using some sort of bastardized form of Spanish, more or less so, depending on the Spanish level of the speaker. Each one would speak Spanish, adding some words from their own native language into it. For instance, Daniele, an Italian, would always say “troppo” (too much) and “ancora” (again; still) instead of the proper Spanish words “demasiado” and “todavía“. But for a French speaker as myself, I could easily pick up those words as they sounded and looked like their French counterparts (“trop” and “encore“). Besides, when talking to him I would use the French word “demain” (tomorrow) instead of Spanish “mañana“, because it sounded more like the Italian “domani“. While the Brazilians would use a more correct Spanish, they would still make some substitutions, for example, the articles “el” and “la” (the) would often be rendered “o” and “a“, as in Portuguese. Sometimes we would even directly speak in our mother tongues and understand each other. (But unfortunately, even if French words look the same as other Latin words when written, they are pronounced so differently that it made French the most difficult language to understand in our group). We made our own pidgin, that is a simple dialect; the first step towards creole. I think that if we were all lost on a remote island, our pidgin would become, after a few years or generations, a full fledged language!

I am preparing a long blog entry that is taking me a long time to write. But, today I want to post a picture of one of my t-shirts that I bought last weekend. This kind of t-shirt is called an “Obamao”, it is a typical revolutionary portrait of Chairman Mao, with the slogan “為人民服務” (Serving the People), but with Obama’s face instead of Mao’s.

This concept was invented when Obama made his first state visit to China in November 2009. During the first few days of his visit, these t-shirts were really popular, until the Chinese government decided to ban them, so as to not embarrass the American President who probably doesn’t like the idea of being associated to Mao. Fortunately, the ban never reached Xi’an, a city that is much less strictly policed than Beijing…

Here is the original image of Mao’s face and his slogan:

Source: http://www.3651go.com/pr-4cfd18167739d0ec4bb3431d27d375f0.html

As you probably noticed, in my last few articles I translated some Chinese texts that I encountered in my daily life: a notice pasted on a door in my apartment building that urged someone to stop urinating in the hallway, an advertisement pasted on the street proposing to buy your sperm for one million and a half yuans, a prescription written by a traditional doctor, made on the fly after he had looked at me for five minutes in a restaurant,… Today, let me show you a translation of a poster located at the entrance of what locals call an “inside village”, a small, empoverished neighborhood, crossed by two or three streets, where migrant workers, prostitutes, poor pimps and second-class mafiosi live. The notice below explains the “immigration” rules in the city. I put “immigration” in quotation marks because it stands for the migration of citizens of one country into a different area of the same country, China; from the countryside to the city. Pay attention on how the notice starts: with gentle, soft words. First, they welcome you and wish you the best of luck. And then, as soon as the second paragraph begins, all the soft words are replaced by a more authoritarian tone “you will positively act in concordance with our work“. This device is very common in Chinese letters or notices. They start beating around the bush, using a soft tone with the aim of softening you, and soon thereafter they catch you off-guard telling you directly all that needs to be said, without detour. Have a good read, and enjoy your short excursion in 1984…

流动人口须知

流动人口朋友：
您好！热情欢迎您的到来。无论您是务工、经商或其他原因来到这里，都为杨家村的发展作出了贡献。我们将为
您提供安全、舒适的居住环境，优质的计划生育生殖健康服务，对您的子女就学提供帮助，并竭力解决您在生产、生活
中的各种困难，充分体现“亲情化管理 温馨式服务”，希望这里成为您的第二个家。
作为我们“杨家村新村民”，希望您能积极配合我们的工作。主动出示身份证、《流动人口婚育证明》等有关证
件，协助房主做好登记，并做到以下几点：
一、遵守《陕西省流动人口计划生育管理办法》、《西安市暂住人口管理条例》等当地各项法律、法规和村里的各
项规章制度。
二、凡在本村居住满30日以上的育龄流动人口，自期满之日起7日内持本人《流动人口婚育证明》、身份证到杨家村
办公室检查，有婚育行为的同时交验户籍地生育证。
三、未持有《流动人口婚育证明》者，请您香到须知后，及时回户籍地办理，以便纳入我村计划生育日常管理。
谢谢您的合作！

党支部
杨家村
村委会

Notice to the Migrant Population

Dear Migrants,

Hi! We warmly welcome you. No matter if you came to work in a factory, if you came on business or for any other reason, you will contribute to Yangjiacun’s development. ["Yangjiacun", name of the "inside village", T.N.] We will provide you with a safe environment and a comfortable place to live in, as well as superior health services in accordance with the One Child Policy, and we will provide your child with assistance in their studies. We will work diligently to resolve any problem that might arise, whether it be childbirth matters or simply everyday life problems. We will fully live up to our motto, which is “affectionate management and warm service”, and we hope that here will become your second home.

As “new Yangjiacun villagers”, we hope you will positively act in concordance with our work. You will actively produce your identification card, your migration, marriage and pregnancy certificate, as well as any other relevant document. In order to assist the owner of your hotel to correctly check you in, please follow the following three steps:

1. Respect the Shaanxi Province measures on migration, and the planning of births, the Xi’an municipal rules on temporary residence, as well as any other local law, and the village rules and laws.

2. Any migrant of childbearing age who plans on living here at least 30 days, must at least 7 days before the end of the 30-day period, go to the Yangjiacun police department building in order to produce their certificate of migration, marriage and childbearing, their identification card and, in the event of a pregnancy, you will need to immediately hand over your census register for examination, and write down the place of marriage or delivery.

3. If you do not have in your possession your certificate of migration, marriage and childbearing, please after reading this notice immediately go to the census register administration office, in order to integrate the daily management of birth planning.

Thank you for your collaboration!

Yangjiacun Branch of the Communist Party
Village Committee

打造平安雁塔
创建卫生城市
构建和谐社会
实行电子监控

长延保办事处
长延保处所

Create a Peaceful Yanta ["Yanta", the name of the district, N.T.]
Establish a Sanitary City
Build a Harmonious Society
Implement an Electronic Surveillance System

Changyan Protection Agency
Changyan Protection Area

枪爆无小事 民安中泰山

To fire a gun is no trivial matter; the security of the people is as important as Mount Tai.

***

The photo in the article “A Sea of People” was also taken at the entrance of Yangjiacun. The majority of the people in the photograph are police officers who went to check the documents of the migrants living in Yangjiacun. They checked the ID cards, the certificates of migration, marriage and childbearing, and all other relevant documents…

It was 7 in the morning in China, I was having breakfast… a baguette.

And it was 7 pm in Montreal..

The NHL Playoffs are back! Last thursday there was an important game: the seventh game of a series, the decisive game whose winner would reach the Eastern conference finals. It was Montreal versus Pittsburgh.

And the Montreal Canadiens won 5-2 against the Pittsburgh Pinguins. They reach the Eastern Conference finals for the first time in 17 years. I could watch the whole game on the Internet, on a Russian website. I did not understand much of what the Russian commentators said, except for the names of the Russian and East-European players, which they could pronounce easily, while the French and English commentators usually struggle just to roll their “r”s.

Next game, versus Philadelphia: Sunday 7 pm, Eastern Time; Monday 7 am, China time.

高楼道小便者书

人，乃万物之灵。知礼仪、
懂廉耻。楼道本是公共之
所。敬劝各位仁兄，万事皆
有归属，肚饥可入饭堂、内
急可入厕之。现已盛夏、楼
道之味足以嗤鼻，望请各位
仁兄自爱、以耻为铭，以廉
为大。

Notice to the Attention of the Person who Urinates in the Hallway

As people, we are the only living beings on our planet endowed with reason, therefore we should all know about proper etiquette, and have a sense of honor. The hallway is a public place. Dear Sir/Madam, I respectfully urge you to understand that all things on earth belong to somebody, so if you feel hungry, go eat; however whenever inside those premises you feel an urge to pee, please go to the toilet. Summer is coming, and at this time of the year, urine in the hallway smells really bad. Please look around you, respected Sir/Madam, and have enough self-respect to distinguish between a shameful and an honorable behavior.

China is History; China is Land; China is People.

This is how a 1944 American propaganda movie titled “Why We Fight: Battle of China” summarized China. China is people, 450 million at the time, 1,4 billion today. China’s massive population has a long history. Back in the dynastic times, China was already the most populous country in the world, which led to some nefarious consequences. While China’s overpopulation provided the country with endless manpower — up until Mao’s Cultural Revolution, there had been very few machines in use in China—without the need of machinery, there was no possible improvement over earlier technologies, which is one of the reasons why China was so backward when the first British envoy, McCartney, arrived in China in 1793.

The Chinese character for “crowd” is composed of “three people”:

As many other Chinese characters, when an element is tripled, it usually means “alot of”, for example: “triple trees”= forest.

But this character for “crowd” is a simplified character. The traditional variant is this one:

which I wouldn’t be able to analyse. On top of the character, there is a “net”（罒）, but underneath, I don’t understand…

I do not know to which extent the simplified version was in use before the simplification of the characters, or if instead, the character was created after the simplification policies of the 1950s… But it seems to me that the simplified version of the character represents better its meaning than its traditional version… unless, of course, it has a meaning that I don’t understand.

重金求子

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本内容已公证，由律师事务所代理，当事人已交150
万保证金，如有违约由律师事务所承担法律责任。
简介：陈佳，28岁，嫁
港地商，夫因意外不育，为
了继承家业，经协商，接探
亲之际，回内地寻找一位
健康，品正，成熟男士；双
方通话满意，收汇20万元
诚信定金，飞往你处，共孕
成功，再付130万一次付清
永不要往；你能圆我做母亲
的梦吗？望健康品正，成熟的男子大胆来电；
(本人倾谈，不诚勿扰，保密不影响家庭）

13699573948

Get Rich, Help us Have a Child

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The following has been notarized by a law firm acting on our behalf to whom a sum of one million five hundred thousand yuans (元1,500,000) has been deposited as earnest money. If one of both parties does not honor their obligations, it will be the law firm’s duty to apply the law.

Brief Presentation: I am CHEN JIA, 28 year old, married to a HONG KONG real estate investor. Due to an accident, my husband is infertile. In order to be able to leave to our next generation our familiy property, after consulting our respective families, we agreed on returning to MAINLAND CHINA to search for a mature and healthy man of high moral standing. We will first get to know you through telephone conversations and if each one of us is satisfied, a first payment of two hundred thousand yuans (元200,000) will be made to you to prove our good faith. Subsequently, we will fly to your location, and when pregnancy will be confirmed, a last payment of one million three hundred thousand yuans (元1,300,000) will be made. Can you help me realize my dream of becoming a mother? I hope that a mature and healthy man of high moral standing will have the courage to call us.

(With you we will have lengthy conversations. If you are not honest, please do not bother. We will keep the secret, there will be no impact on your family life).

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Do you trust this ad?